She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness. Proverbs 31:26. YRP 81.1
The Lord will help every one of us where we need help the most in the grand work of overcoming and conquering self. Let the law of kindness be upon your lips and the oil of grace in your heart. This will produce wonderful results. You will be tender, sympathetic, courteous. You need all these graces. The Holy Spirit must be received and brought into your character; then it will be as holy fire, giving forth incense which will rise up to God, not from lips that condemn, but as a healer of the souls of men. Your countenance will express the image of the divine. YRP 81.2
No sharp, critical, blunt, or severe words should be spoken. This is common fire, and must be left out of all our councils and intercourse with our brethren. God requires every soul in His service to kindle their censers from the coals of sacred fire. The common, severe, harsh words that come from your lips so readily must be withheld, and the Spirit of God speak through the human agent. By beholding the character of Christ you will become changed into His likeness. The grace of Christ alone can change your heart and then you will reflect the image of the Lord Jesus. God calls upon us to be like Him—pure, holy, and undefiled. We are to bear the divine image.—The SDA Bible Commentary, 3:1164, Ellen G. White Comments. YRP 81.3
We may talk of the blessings of the Holy Spirit, and pray in regard to receiving them; but unless the human agent is worked by the Spirit of God, He reveals that he has Him not. When the Spirit molds and fashions the character after the divine similitude, He will be unmistakably revealed in every word we speak and in everything we do, showing to the world that there is a marked difference between the children of light and the children of darkness. The Lord wants us to stand stiffly for the faith once delivered to the saints. We are to speak the truth in love. Our great Teacher says, “Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me, for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light” (Matthew 11:29, 30).—Letter 84, 1899. YRP 81.4