Ellen G. White Writings

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Testimonies for the Church, vol. 2, Page 415

would not be answered by fine, elevated love, but by the lower order of passions; that these would be strengthened, but not pure, deep, holy love.

Your wife should make strong efforts to come out of her retired, dignified reserve, and cultivate simplicity in all her actions. And when the higher order of faculties is aroused in you, and strengthened by exercise, you will better understand the wants of women; you will understand that the soul craves love of a higher, purer order than exists in the low order of animal passions. These passions have been strengthened in you by encouragement and exercise. If now in the fear of God you keep your body under, and seek to meet your wife with pure, elevated love, the wants of her nature will be met. Take her to your heart; esteem her highly.

You have been exalted and have taken a position above your wife. You have not understood yourself. You have had a high appreciation of your religious experience and advancement in the divine life. These things have hindered, instead of helping, your wife. She feared for you, feared that you did not really understand yourself, and that you would go too fast. Your union has not been happy. You have been unsuited to each other. Your wife has a timid, fearful, shrinking nature. You have utterly failed to understand her. She hesitates and fears to move out because she is afraid of going too fast. She needs confidence in herself and should encourage independence.

Brother M, you fail to encourage the confidence of your wife. You are lacking in courteousness and in constant, kindly regard for her. You sometimes manifest love, but it is a selfish love. It is not principle with you, reaching down deep and underlying all your actions. It is not an unselfish love, which prompts a continual forethought for her and a care to have her in your society, showing her that you prefer her company

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