Picture: Counsel #18 — Identity CR 194.1
No human being can be your everything. When your identity, happiness, or sense of self-worth depends on how your partner responds, notices, or reassures you, your relationship will become strained under a weight it was never meant to carry. Clinginess, jealousy, or unrealistic expectations often stem from a deeper wound: forgetting who you are in Christ. CR 194.2
Marriage is a gift, but it cannot replace the security that only God provides. When we lose sight of our worth in Him, we’ll start expecting our spouse to fill emotional and spiritual voids only the Lord can fill. This will lead to disappointment when your spouse doesn’t meet every need perfectly. Putting this type of pressure on your spouse is not only unfair, but it could also lead them to intentionally distancing themselves from you. True self-worth comes from knowing you are fully loved, chosen, and complete in Christ. From that foundation, you can offer love freely without expecting to get something in return because your cup is already full in Jesus. You don’t need constant affirmation to be complete—you are whole in Him.[201] https://www.gcyouthministries.org/wp-content/uploads/Identity-Devotional.pdf CR 194.3
“And in Christ you have been brought to fullness. He is the head over every power and authority.” Colossians 2:10 NIV CR 194.4
“God is love.” Ellen White in The Acts of the Apostles, p. 9 CR 194.5
Reflect: Are you looking to your spouse for identity and worth, or are you living out of the truth that you are already whole in Christ? CR 194.6
