Lt 262, 1902

White, J. E.; White, Emma

“Elmshaven,” St. Helena, California

October 23, 1902

Portions of this letter are published in 5Bio 396.

Dear Children, James Edson and Emma White,—

I wish to say that your last letters have been received in regard to the five hundred dollars. Willie proposed I draw from my bank deposit, which I had been enabled to hire, the sum of five hundred dollars to relieve the situation. This was his proposition. I called for a donation Sunday afternoon, and there was nearly a hundred dollars raised. This I had specified should go to the Southern field. I have seventy-five dollars from Brother Harper, tithe money, and we thought that it would be best to send it along to the Southern field to help colored ministers.17LtMs, Lt 262, 1902, par. 1

I have been writing matter to send away on the morrow. I am perplexed as to what to write and do not think I will write as I might write, lest advantage be taken of my words and confusion and trial come to me. I am much perplexed over the state of things. The debts continually accumulating are a load upon my soul. You know I have often charged you, Do not go into debt. I dare not be connected with this matter. If I can see any way to help, I will, but I keep very still on the Fresno camp-ground.17LtMs, Lt 262, 1902, par. 2

Sunday afternoon I had a large audience. I had a very decided testimony, and the congregation was deeply interested. I said nothing to any one. I thought I would get in before any call was made, because there was a large number of outsiders present. I knew they would respond, and they did. That is the history of the money. I will send seventy-five dollars tithe money from Walter Harper. I want it specially applied to the colored ministers, to help them in their salaries.17LtMs, Lt 262, 1902, par. 3

I have much to be thankful for, but I have not slept well nights—four and five hours and sometimes less. If we could have you now at our table, we have plenty of good, fresh applesauce right from the apples picked from the tree, the most beautiful, finely flavored grapes, black and white, and plenty of fresh tomatoes. Fresh corn is gone, but we can purchase some from Brother Hicks on the hill.17LtMs, Lt 262, 1902, par. 4

But I have not one word to urge, for I would not advise you what to do. I dare not take responsibility. I must be guarded on the right hand and on the left, and be careful and move cautiously lest confidence be weakened in the message God has for me to bear.17LtMs, Lt 262, 1902, par. 5