But I am not going to write much. I am too nervous. I am better than I have been. I am improving, but it is slow. We will not attend the camp meetings this season. I fear I am not strong enough. I wish I could write, but my head will not let me.3LtMs, Lt 2a, 1881, par. 2

I received a letter from Brother [S. N.] Haskell. I view Eld. [D. M.] Canright as he does, first in the fire and then in the water. I have considerably more courage in the Lord, not because I have happy flights of feeling, but because I trust God’s Word and myself in His hands. I think Elder Haskell should cease from labor entirely for a season and rest. I think he will displease God if he pursues the course he has done. God lives and reigns and He does not require that much of us, that we shall quickly kill ourselves and that be the end of us. A living dog is better than a dead lion, for the living know that they shall die, but the dead know not anything.3LtMs, Lt 2a, 1881, par. 3

April 8

Otsego, [New York]

Since commencing my letter to you, I have come here to Otsego. I hardly dared venture, but the sun has shown today. We had a light carriage and an excellent span of horses, so we were brought right along, not very much wearied. But after sitting from eight a.m., until half past four p.m., I find relief in using my faithful crutches and walking from room to room. I see I am growing stronger but can endure so little.3LtMs, Lt 2a, 1881, par. 4

I spoke last Sabbath forenoon and then, being urged, attended conference meeting and spoke about fifteen minutes. We had a very interesting meeting, but it was too much for me. All next day I was almost blind and so nervous I knew not what to do with myself.3LtMs, Lt 2a, 1881, par. 5

Carrie Haskins has been with me two weeks and has been giving me treatment consisting chiefly of sitz baths and movements.3LtMs, Lt 2a, 1881, par. 6

Since commencing this letter I have seen Elder Canright only a few minutes. He seemed very much surprised that reports should be made of the character of his labors at Danvers. He seems to think his labors were of a right nature and the influence good. He says he wrote back to Danvers what had been reported and they returned answer they were surprised at any such report. He is very anxious we should connect together and be convinced that he was laboring all right. He has just been in with his intended, introduced [her]. She is a girl highly thought of and intelligent. She is a school teacher, not perhaps devotional, but is a Sabbathkeeper. Her mother has been a Sabbathkeeper for many years. Her father makes no professions of religion. Elder Canright will be married in two weeks. I will say we must be careful how we treat our ministers for there are few enough.3LtMs, Lt 2a, 1881, par. 7

I have [a] great many questions in regard to Elder Canright but do not think it best to let him know we regard him with suspicion. There is much lost by holding off and appearing distant and unsympathizing with those who are under temptation and who err from the truth; but everything is too deep for me now. I just let my mind stop running.3LtMs, Lt 2a, 1881, par. 8

I dreamed, about two days before Brother Haskell’s letter, of being in California and speaking to the people, and again I dreamed of being in a field of fruit. I held up some clusters of tomatoes not fully ripe but ripening and asked others to see how full and perfect was the fruit, and I was surrounded with it.3LtMs, Lt 2a, 1881, par. 9

All have just left for meeting. I am the only one there is in the house. I am at Brother Leighton’s. Elder Canright speaks tonight.3LtMs, Lt 2a, 1881, par. 10

April 11

Home again

I would so much love to see you all, but I try to be reconciled to being away from my children. We certainly have a very nice home. All that nature could do to make it lovely has been done, but I fear the climate for me.3LtMs, Lt 2a, 1881, par. 11

I am very glad to hear such good news from Oakland. May the Lord still work for you all in power is my prayer.3LtMs, Lt 2a, 1881, par. 12

I find some cotton stockings which I will send by mail. You did not tell me what way to send them. Cotton stockings are not knit in the knitting factory. I have made two new shirts for Willie [White] and will make more if you desire it. I was not pleased with the polonaise made for you. That little narrow piece would not have [been] put on it if it had been done by my dressmaker.3LtMs, Lt 2a, 1881, par. 13

Did you get the handkerchiefs all right? Twelve for you, six for Willie. Your boxes are safely stored in my chambers in the very boxes you made for them. They will be safe. Can we do any other sewing for you? I have a dressmaker who will make garments very nice, but will not cut; but this can be done mostly by myself. I cut out most of your things; and some things, when [I was] too weak to cut, were laid down before me, and [I] told just where to put the pattern, while I was in bed.3LtMs, Lt 2a, 1881, par. 14

Dear children, I hope you will, neither of you, do too much. Be careful of your strength. God would not have you tax yourselves to that degree that you will lessen physical and mental powers so that you will have less to serve Him with than if you worked temperately and retained the full vigor of your powers to do with efficiency whatever is done. Will you be guarded on this point, and will you work with that moderation that will not wear and enfeeble?3LtMs, Lt 2a, 1881, par. 15

I have done wrong. I have brought myself very low. I feel guilty before God of placing myself in a position through overwork where I can do but little I have some hope still. I spoke Sabbath at Otsego with great freedom to a full house of believers and unbelievers.3LtMs, Lt 2a, 1881, par. 16

Sunday p.m., spoke to a crowded house; a large part of them were unbelievers. The Lord gave me tongue and utterance and strength to speak His Words, and solemnity was upon the congregation, that we seldom see. Young and old listened as if spellbound. I was told many of the most hardened sinners wept and left the house in tears.3LtMs, Lt 2a, 1881, par. 17

We have just arrived at home. It commenced raining when we were near our home, within four miles. We found all well.3LtMs, Lt 2a, 1881, par. 18

Sister Anderson left us last Thursday to work in the office. They needed her very much. We took her out of the office. As we have no girl, Addie cooks. We shall get help soon. The children have done so well for me this winter. They are attentive, kind; and what could I have done without them in my helpless, crippled condition?3LtMs, Lt 2a, 1881, par. 19

I have a particular request to make that Willie and Elder Haskell shall take hold thoroughly of that Healdsburg property. Who is on the place? What is it rented for, and all about it? Do not put this off for it is not right. I do not think that man should remain on the terms he has done, pretending to put in eight dollars worth of improvements a month. Let him show what he has done. Better let old Brother Young on it for some price and empty that set out; but sell if possible or exchange for Oakland property. Sell for three thousand dollars. We then lose $1,000. Do please write us something about these matters.3LtMs, Lt 2a, 1881, par. 20

The fur you mention should be in circular form as near like my cape as the material will allow. The tabs should be taken off. They offered to dye it and line it with the best of silk and fit it in any shape we wanted for fifty dollars. I leave this to your judgment. You are on the ground and may do just as you think it will pay.3LtMs, Lt 2a, 1881, par. 21

Please put all my woolen goods where they will not get moth-eaten. Will you look in a box in the chamber of the addition to the office and get the pink merino undersuits of mine? Send them by mail. You can do them up in two packages. I will color them and use the pieces for some purpose. I believe I have now mentioned all the little items I can think of.3LtMs, Lt 2a, 1881, par. 22

So good-by. Love to you both. May the Lord bless you, my children.3LtMs, Lt 2a, 1881, par. 23

In haste,3LtMs, Lt 2a, 1881, par. 24

Mother.

Lt 2, 1881

Lt 3, 1881